Cask of Amontillado, Anyone?

So... if it's not an April Fool's thing, I guess the Fort Hood shooter creature is going on a hunger strike to protest his betters.

And I guess my response is 

Attack of the Killer 1985

I have been assimilated.

Now that I have seen it, I can formally partition my life into BKF ("Before I saw Kung Fury), and AKF ("After I saw Kung Fury") sections.

Find 30 spare minutes.  Then watch this.  All of it.

Star Wars VII

No spoilers.

From the trailers and posters I figured it wasn't a movie for me.  I was probably going to just wait for the BluRay.

But then my buddy asked me to take him to his early AM colonoscopy appointment, and afterwards he bought me breakfast and took us to the new Star Wars movie.

The experiences were similar.

After a few weeks of contemplation, and having only seen Cloverfield, the first Trek abomination, and TFA, I type the following:

To me, JJ Abrams is the knock-knock joke of moviemaking.  His stuff is watchable because I'm vaguely interested in seeing how it works out, but the dread outweighs the anticipation, and the dread is always rewarded.

It's In the Trees - It's Squatting!

I don't even...

WTF?

Happy Thanksgiving!

geeksfromlastnight?

before there was textsfromlastnight, there was bash.org:

#954315 +(260)- [X]

<@LAMMJohnson> I suspect Star Trek Into Darkness will be good but not great.
<@LAMMJohnson> My reasoning for this is thus                 
<@LAMMJohnson> Perfect score because all of its words have a length that is a power of 2.
<@LAMMJohnson> Minus one point because total letters is not a power of two.
<@LAMMJohnson> Not even including spaces.
<@LAMMJohnson> However, the letters in all of the words plus the number of words is 24.
<@LAMMJohnson> Overall score for the movie: 8.5                         
<~chown> LAMMJohnson - Vice Executive of the Autism Department   
<@LAMMJohnson> The score, correctly, is a power of two marred with an ugly fraction.
<@LAMMJohnson> Although the fraction is 1/2
<@LAMMJohnson> Actually, the overall fraction is 17/20 which I pretty much hate.
<@LAMMJohnson> Which means I will initially think the movie is OK but then later change my mind and hate it.
<~chown> LAMMJohnson - Honourable Chairman of the Autism Empire

I Don't Care, I'm Posting This Anyway

Nyub nyub - Spooky-ooky!

Sometimes you don't just see a movie.  You experience it.

The Exorcist.  I'm not really much of a horror guy.  I'd read some, watched some, mainly because of my early GF.  I get to the Twin Cities years ago, meet a guy who's a real aficionado - seen 'em all, knows the limited-appeal vs. the mass appeal, etc.

He finds out that I've never seen The Exorcist.

He doesn't spew, doesn't pontificate, doesn't wax horrifical-like.  Simply says I must see it.  He find one or two others in our group who haven't seen it either.

Gathers us, and a bunch of others, at his house.  He & his wife get things set up so we have plenty of comfy chairs.  He explains that he's going to turn all the lights off, and would appreciate it if no one talked or even, if possible, broke for a smoke except when he would pause it, once.

He got us settled in front of his big-screen, then he hit Play.

And that movie proceeded to scare the crap out of me.  It was wonderful.

I've watched a lot of movies.  A lot.  With a lot of different types of people.  And I have to say that my 2 horror movie friends (yes, I've known two, and probably seen movies you haven't, through them and others) have been the best at knowing their movie audience, and best at setting a proper movie mood.

Welcome to Sher-HOLY FUCK!

Condition Legolas?

Cardinal Envy, Your Party is Holding Your Table

Yes, Jon Stewart is an uber liberal.  Yes, it's a disgrace and a lens on Our Times that the Daily Show is an actual source of "news" for bajillions of Americans.

But you know what?

Jon Stewart is effing hilarious.  The Daily Show is, most times (IMO), effing hilarious.

And when, that 1 time out of 100 when he/they turn their lens on non-conservative ... things?

I laugh my head off.  Because it's effing hilarious.

So let's be honest with ourselves, fellow travelers - we don't dislike Jon Stewart and his platform.

We envy it.

Here's another one I like from the beforetimes.

If Jon Stewart and his Daily Show were 100 to 1 in our corner?  We'd be making fun of anyone and everyone who didn't "get it".

Get it?

Wave at the Wave

Just finished my 2nd cigar and putting this night to bed.

Planned on drinking lots of bourbon, but actually didn't - just a couple of glasses of the good stuff.  Finished off the last of the current bottle of Buffalo Trace Single Oak.  Maybe if it was a Friday, maybe if I still didn't have to be at work until 3pm like the last few years instead of on a conf call at 8am with my new schedule, maybe if I didn't actually have to spend 3 hours tonight logged in finishing up work I couldn't get to earlier today...

So I'm going to be tired tomorrow, but not hung over.

Oh well.  My intentions were sound. :)

MN looks bad unless we really did take the MN House as it looked like we might a couple of hours ago, and Mills over Nolan (MN) and Brown over Shaheen (non-MN) would've been nice, but... pretty awesome overall.  Truth is most of the key MN Repub candidates just weren't that great.  "I'm not the other guy" just doesn't cut it, most nights, it seems.  Maybe we'll learn.

Ortho followup 11/11, and hopefully I can start using my left arm for real again after that.

"China is here, mister Burton."

"'China is here'? I don't even know what the hell that means.  All I know is, this Lo Pan character comes out of thin air in the middle of goddamned alley with his buddies flyin' around on wires, cuttin' everybody to pieces, and he just stands there waitin' for me to drive my truck straight through him?  With light comin' out of his mouth?!?"

Dig it:

And, really apropos of nothing, if you like Westerns, and like Tarantino's stuff at least a little, and like things that get a little... weird, check out The Good, the Bad, and the Weird.

Great soundtrack, too.

Told Ya.

Yep, Jonah pretty much says it all.

If you can’t take some joy, some modicum of relief and mirth, in the unprecedentedly spectacular beclowning of the president, his administration, its enablers, and, to no small degree, liberalism itself, then you need to ask yourself why you’re following politics in the first place.

When You've Lost Hitler...

"I Expect I'll Have It Sorted Out by Morning"

One of my favorite sleeper movies is The Ghost and the Darkness.  Not a big movie, just a movie about a story.  Much/most of it happens to be mostly true, even.  And a great soundtrack.

And, for a gunny-wannabe I have to say that I don't know that much about guns, but this movie has more rifles in it then "Rifles: The Movie (About Rifles)".

I expect Tam has most of them in a glass case or something.

Self Promotion

Had the night off work so I watched the Veep debate. (Disclosure: I'm a pretty enthusiastic Romney/Ryan guy.)

The big story is going to be the "about even on points but wow, Biden was an absolute creepy fuckstick the whole time, eh?" analysis.  But since Meataxe & I chatted back & forth during the debate I'd like to post the points I made that I'm most enamored of:

Giving Ryan an opportunity to talk about Medicare is like giving Peter North an opportunity to fill a specimen cup.

 and Biden just turned up the cackling prick factor to 11

we did A-gan right.  Pay the shitholes to fuck the worse shitholes with minimal footprint

then some chowdah-head decides we have to surge in the shittiest place on the planet

Ryan should say "Look, the whole REASON I'm on this ticket is because a Trillion is a really big fucking number, people.  You don't run from a Trillion.  Even Hans Gruber said that if you steal $600 you can simply disappear but if you steal 600 MILLION they WILL find you unless you're already dead.  And a trillion is more than 600 million.  Yippe-ki-yay, motherfuckers."

 I want a townhall forum here int he Twin Cities where I can ask Ryan if he has any .45 long Colt he could spare.

They should let me & Meataxe moderate the next one. I think I'd go for the Mark Levin style:

"You're an idiot and that's not an answer!"

"You - Haircut - you say you can do better than the current pack of clowns.  How?!?"

 

I'd enjoy it, anyway.

"You Know How I Said I Liked You, Sully?"

I lied.

I dragged my buttocks to the range Sunday after all with my new toy.

That's all at 50ft, the max distance at Bill's (indoor).  Played with the sights a little, got used to the action, etc.  Not good, and a lot of high and to the right (target's sideways), but not terrible for a guy who's not fired anything much but handguns for nigh-on 10 years.

I only have the one mag still so my reloading digits got tired before my shooty desire did, but 250 rounds later I can say I'm definitely hooked.  Next up, I guess, is one o' them fancy red dots and a bunch of spare mags.  And a trip to an outdoor range where I can truly embarrass myself.

Somebody Has a New Toy, and that Somebody is Me.

Atom Smasher: "I don't go to the range enough."
MeatAxe: "Cease thy ruminations and obtain for thyself an MP15-22."
Atom Smasher: "Aye."


Was going to go break it in today, feeling too lazy (and I am working the holiday tomorrow) so will go read in the sun instead.  But I am looking forward to next Saturday - every purchase at Bill's gets you a free range ticket, so it's a guaranteed good time.

It's so LIGHT!

Ode to Joy Indeed

This weekend I was in Boston (Hi Jay!) - my mom flew her little brood in to catch the Boston Symphony.  We have a minor tradition of doing Tanglewood every couple of summers for Beethoven's 9th Symphony (although one year we did the 1812 instead) but this year my mom wanted to do a nice steak place afterward so Boston it was.  (HINT FOR THE GUYS: TANGLEWOOD.  FALL.  EXPENSIVE.  BUT DO IT FOR THE LADY. JUST SHUT UP AND DO IT.)

Worst cabbies ever?  I had 'em.  But it was very nice to see my family, as we're scattered throughout Massachusetts, Connecticut, Pennsylvania, and Minnesota.  And Flemings serves up one NICE piece of steerflesh.  And out waitress was awesome.

I'd never been to Symphony Hall before, and it was very impressive.  We had good back-balcony seats and the acoustics were great.

When you bring the Tanglewood Chorus to your auditorium for the 4th movement of Beethoven's 9th, you tend to look for other chorale pieces for them to do, and accordingly the program Friday opened up with Stravinsky's Symphony of Psalms.  Embarrassingly, I don't know much about Stravinsky except the parts of the Rites of Spring that Disney used for Fantasia, but after listening to his Symphony of Psalms, I can confidently say: The Strav-monster liked him some oboes.

I was thinking about taking an extra day and visiting my blog-partner but he'd picked this weekend to run up and down a muddy mountain with his wife.

Selfish bastard, that one.


Anyway, the Ninth.  Wow.  4th time I've seen it live, and it still wrenches at me.  Thank you, Ludwig Van.

Potassium Nitrate + charcoal + Sulfur = Fun!

I went to the range today for the first time in TOO LONG. Started with my favorite semi-auto, my Steyr M9 (9mm): Dialed myself in at 15 feet, was reasonably happy with the results. After 20 or so rounds, moved the paper to 21 feet, and aside from a serious case of "death grip" to the point where my hand was literally shaking, relaxed enough to be satisfied with the 100 rounds I put through it.


I like my M9.

Next was my alternate carry piece, my Taurus Millennium Pro .45. My fellow gun nuts all tell me that Taurus products suck and are unreliable, but I fed yet another 100 rounds of .45 through the thing and with nary a hiccup and was reasonably satisfied with my accuracy. Still need more practice, of course, but I'm happy (albeit not ecstatic) with where the holes in the paper appeared.

With all the "work" done, I switched to my true calling - my Ruger Vaquero in .45 long Colt and a Zombie target. 50 rounds at 21 feet. And what can I say? I'm good.

Single action cowboy gun, never using the sights, simple old-fashioned point shooting with gun raised up and held between belt and eyeline, and I'll say it:

I'm good. Really really good. Not great. But good.

When the zombie apocalypse comes, I'll have "better", more modern guns, because I'm not stupid, but strapped to my right leg will be a big-ass, honking SA revolver. Because the bullets all go where I think they should without any effort.

And the best part is that I equipped and dragged 3 pistols to the range and used them, and completely forgot about the snubbie S&W Airweight .38 I had in my pocket. Never even thought to put a round through it.

I love America and my part in it.

"Sak!"

So, apparently, in the new John Carter, formerly "Of Mars" movie, the red Martians aren't red - they have little red tattoos or something.

Now I read that overall it's not too bad, and I'm going to buy the Blu-ray when it comes out for sure so they'll get more from me than the price of the movie eventually, but how dumb do these humps have to be to just casually wipe away the basic elements of a beloved story and expect to make their hundreds of millions back?