Saturday, January 24, 2015

And That's the Truth! PPpbbbbffffttt!!!!!!

I'd like to offer my particular man-pig lens on the whole "man contrasted with woman" thing.  In general, of course.  With exceptions noted.

In America, the desired end-state of the average woman is some version of Audrey Hepburn's Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany's.

Whereas the desired state of the average man is some version of John Wayne's or Jeff Bridges' Rooster Cogburn in True Grit.

Now, I'm not saying that necessarily implies any complications in relations between the sexes, but...

I am saying it's kinda true.  Chew on that and spit out what you will.

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Cardinal Envy, Your Party is Holding Your Table

Yes, Jon Stewart is an uber liberal.  Yes, it's a disgrace and a lens on Our Times that the Daily Show is an actual source of "news" for bajillions of Americans.

But you know what?

Jon Stewart is effing hilarious.  The Daily Show is, most times (IMO), effing hilarious.

And when, that 1 time out of 100 when he/they turn their lens on non-conservative ... things?

I laugh my head off.  Because it's effing hilarious.

So let's be honest with ourselves, fellow travelers - we don't dislike Jon Stewart and his platform.

We envy it.

Here's another one I like from the beforetimes.

If Jon Stewart and his Daily Show were 100 to 1 in our corner?  We'd be making fun of anyone and everyone who didn't "get it".

Get it?

Sunday, December 7, 2014

News Flash: 316.1 Million+ Americans Who Didn't Resist Arrest Yesterday Still Alive

Don't fight cops.

Sunday, November 23, 2014


Not meaning to offend, and all that, but really, do the Intelligent Design folks have any arguments that are more robust than "isn't it amazing that my legs are long enough to reach the ground?"

Because when I run into this topic, it seems that I'm supposed to find the above position compelling, and if that's all they've got then it's even less sciencey than they think they want it to be.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Wave at the Wave

Just finished my 2nd cigar and putting this night to bed.

Planned on drinking lots of bourbon, but actually didn't - just a couple of glasses of the good stuff.  Finished off the last of the current bottle of Buffalo Trace Single Oak.  Maybe if it was a Friday, maybe if I still didn't have to be at work until 3pm like the last few years instead of on a conf call at 8am with my new schedule, maybe if I didn't actually have to spend 3 hours tonight logged in finishing up work I couldn't get to earlier today...
So I'm going to be tired tomorrow, but not hung over.

Oh well.  My intentions were sound. :)
MN looks bad unless we really did take the MN House as it looked like we might a couple of hours ago, and Mills over Nolan (MN) and Brown over Shaheen (non-MN) would've been nice, but... pretty awesome overall.  Truth is most of the key MN Repub candidates just weren't that great.  "I'm not the other guy" just doesn't cut it, most nights, it seems.  Maybe we'll learn.
Ortho followup 11/11, and hopefully I can start using my left arm for real again after that.

Monday, November 3, 2014

This is Some "Look at What I Almost Stepped In!" Dumb

Haven't done a ton of politics here lately, but I read this today and simply could not resist. It's such a dumb, vapid - and, if you've ever read anything by a liberal before - utterly predictable essay that it will take me longer to format the post than to comment on the content.

From the NYT comes some superdumb, and I'll translate each graf because it's easy: I speak jive.
DURHAM, N.C. — By Tuesday night about 90 million Americans will have cast ballots in an election that’s almost certain to create greater partisan divisions, increase gridlock and render governance of our complex nation even more difficult. Ninety million sounds like a lot, but that means that less than 40 percent of the electorate will bother to vote, even though candidates, advocacy groups and shadowy “super PACs” will have spent more than $1 billion to air more than two million ads to influence the election.
Election money bad.

There was a time when midterm elections made sense — at our nation’s founding, the Constitution represented a new form of republican government, and it was important for at least one body of Congress to be closely accountable to the people. But especially at a time when Americans’ confidence in the ability of their government to address pressing concerns is at a record low, two-year House terms no longer make any sense. We should get rid of federal midterm elections entirely.
Don't like your medicine?  Have more of it then, rube.

There are few offices, at any level of government, with two-year terms. Here in Durham, we elect members of the school board and the county sheriff to terms that are double that length. Moreover, Twitter, ubiquitous video cameras, 24-hour cable news and a host of other technologies provide a level of hyper-accountability the framers could not possibly have imagined. In the modern age, we do not need an election every two years to communicate voters’ desires to their elected officials.
Modern life is so fast and full, accountability can't keep up, so we ditch it.
But the two-year cycle isn’t just unnecessary; it’s harmful to American politics.
Politics and the bedbugs that populate it would be less shitty if we just lie back and count ceiling tiles until it's over.

The main impact of the midterm election in the modern era has been to weaken the president, the only government official (other than the powerless vice president) elected by the entire nation. Since the end of World War II, the president’s party has on average lost 25 seats in the House and about 4 in the Senate as a result of the midterms. This is a bipartisan phenomenon — Democratic presidents have lost an average of 31 House seats and between 4 to 5 Senate seats in midterms; Republican presidents have lost 20 and 3 seats, respectively.
Leave Britney alone!
The realities of the modern election cycle are that we spend almost two years selecting a president with a well-developed agenda, but then, less than two years after the inauguration, the midterm election cripples that same president’s ability to advance that agenda.
If you don't like your president's agenda, you get to keep your president's agenda.
These effects are compounded by our grotesque campaign finance system. House members in competitive races have raised, on average, $2.6 million for the 2014 midterm. That amounts to $3,600 raised a day — seven days a week, 52 weeks a year. Surveys show that members spend up to 70 percent of their time fund-raising during an election year. Two years later, they’ll have to do it all again.
Market economics bad.

Much of this money is sought from either highly partisan wealthy individuals or entities with vested interests before Congress. Eliminating midterms would double the amount of time House members could focus on governing and make them less dependent on their donor base.
As time increases, time to raise money does not increase.

Another quirk is that, during midterm elections, the electorate has been whiter, wealthier, older and more educated than during presidential elections. Biennial elections require our representatives to take this into account, appealing to one set of voters for two years, then a very different electorate two years later.
There’s an obvious, simple fix, though. The government should, through a constitutional amendment, extend the term of House members to four years and adjust the term of senators to either four or eight years, so that all elected federal officials would be chosen during presidential election years. Doing so would relieve some (though, of course, not all) of the systemic gridlock afflicting the federal government and provide members of Congress with the ability to focus more time and energy on governance instead of electioneering.
Our Federal government was not designed by the Founding Fathers, it was sneezed onto a sleeve by accident.

This adjustment would also give Congress the breathing space to consider longer-term challenges facing the nation — such as entitlement spending, immigration and climate change — that are either too complex or politically toxic to tackle within a two-year election cycle.
Government should do more.

To offset the impact of longer congressional terms, this reform might be coupled with term limits that would cap an individual’s total congressional service at, say, 24 years, about the average for a member of Congress today. This would provide members enough time to build experience in the job, but also limit the effects of incumbency and ensure the circulation of new blood in the system.
Giving politicians more time and power to dig in combined with decreasing the number of elections will increase turnover.
The framers included an amendment process in the Constitution so our nation could adjust the system to meet the demands of a changing world. Surely they would not be pleased with the dysfunction, partisan acrimony and public dissatisfaction that plague modern politics. Eliminating the midterm elections would be one small step to fixing our broken system.
That amendment part is still pretty cool though.

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

"China is here, mister Burton."

"'China is here'? I don't even know what the hell that means.  All I know is, this Lo Pan character comes out of thin air in the middle of goddamned alley with his buddies flyin' around on wires, cuttin' everybody to pieces, and he just stands there waitin' for me to drive my truck straight through him?  With light comin' out of his mouth?!?"

Dig it:

And, really apropos of nothing, if you like Westerns, and like Tarantino's stuff at least a little, and like things that get a little... weird, check out The Good, the Bad, and the Weird.

Great soundtrack, too.

Monday, June 2, 2014

The First Rule of... Oh, Whatever

So I'm watching Fight Club for the 3rd or 4th time last weekend and it hit me: the batshit craziest guy in the movie isn't the Ed Norton character.

It's the guy who, upon seeing Ed Norton's character beating himself up in the parking lot, asked to be next.

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Texts From Superheroes

Texts From Superheroes

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Again with the No Degrees

It's 2 out right now at 7:20pm.  That's 2F.  Earlier today as I was shoveling the few inches of snow we got the last couple of days, it was 17, but the wind was coming up.  A wind, once it really gets howling later on tonight, could pretty much kill you.

Because it's going to be -20 without the wind.  Yeah, -20.  And the wind is going pretty good right now as it is.  I'm glad I got the new windows in last year.

Now, I'm in the wussy East part of the state in the Twin Cities, not the manly Western parts near the Dakotas that are getting real blizzard-die-die-die conditions right now.  So, I'll probably be able to see the road tomorrow as I head into work.  Of course, everyone with kids is going to no-doubt have to deal with school closings again, so at least I'll get a good parking space.

A couple of weeks ago it was -24 when I woke up at 7am or so.  -24.  But that was a pretty calm day.  I don't envy me, my morning.

It seems like every day since December 1st, save 4 or 5, has been either below zero, snowing, or both.

No point to any of this, really, I just like to remind myself about the people who handled all this 200 years ago in sod huts.

Saturday, December 14, 2013



Snow or Spiders - you can't tell, hahahahahahaha - wait, where are you going...?

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Told Ya.

Yep, Jonah pretty much says it all.

If you can’t take some joy, some modicum of relief and mirth, in the unprecedentedly spectacular beclowning of the president, his administration, its enablers, and, to no small degree, liberalism itself, then you need to ask yourself why you’re following politics in the first place.

Saturday, November 9, 2013


I'm not a dream guy.

I've never met Tam.

I had a dream the other morning where me and my blog partner met Tam in Indiana-ville, then we were in a gun store and we were introduced to, and subsequently made fun of, a mare's legged Mosin Nagant.

It was long.

And that's why I'm not really a dream guy.

Saturday, September 7, 2013


I'm a pretty Hawky, World Policeman kind of guy. And I won't cry if Assad the Chinless slips on a bar of "oh shit I'm an evil, murderous dictator and it finally caught up with me" in the shower and snuffs it.

The problem with this Syria thing isn't that they aren't a threat to our national interests, nor is it that someone uncorked some death gel. The problem isn't that we might knock somebody's block off or fire a few Tomahawks at now-abandoned airfields.

The problem, as I see it, is that no matter what we do or don't do, and for whatever reasons really smart guys say we should or should not do it, Obama will still be El Presidente afterwards. So bad idea or good idea, Obama will make it turn out badly for this country and bad for the West. I don't see it as much more complicated than that.

Monday, September 2, 2013

When You've Lost Hitler...