Dribble, dribble, dribble, shoot, Swish!

"As Goodgulf stepped onto the bridge the passage echoed with an ominous dribble, dribble, and a great crowd of narcs burst forth. In their midst was a towering dark shadow too terrible to describe. In its hand it held a huge black globe and on its chest was written in cruel runes, "Villanova".

"Aiyee," shouted Legolam. "A ballhog!"

Anyone who loves Tolkien's Lord of the Rings, and who has even a spark of a sense of humor, should hie them hence and grab a copy of Harvard Lampoon's old chestnut,
Bored of the Rings.

And be prepared to sprain a latissimus laughing. Trust me.